Friday, April 18th, 2008...5:05 pm
#27: Britax Car Seats
The Best Parent is better than you because they will ONLY put their child in a Britax car seat. In the Best Parent’s mind, any other brand is akin to strapping one’s child in an infant-sized electric chair or Iron Maiden. Fatal injuries are assured at the slightest scuff on the Prius. Someone using a Perego? Graco? Or even (GASP!) Evenflo? Call Child Protective Services immediately!
The Chicco Key Fit car seat actually scored higher in Consumer Reports safety testing (and they haven’t even withdrawn that report yet). But don’t tell that to the Best Parent. For them, the Britax is the perfect little, bombproof, backseat bunker that will save their brood from anything short of a direct nuclear strike. The irony is that all car seats are only effective if properly installed, and 80 percent of them are not. Remember Britney Spears problems with her car seat? It turns out, believe it or not, that she is a Best Parent too.
So, take that, safety-conscious parents everywhere! When the apocalypse hits, don’t even TRY hiding beneath your Graco and Evenlo. The Best Parent child, however, will be sitting pretty inside their Britax, with nary a blemish on their 5-point harness and “comfort foam.” Of course, the world will be destroyed, but at least the Best Parent will still be better than you.
5 Comments
April 18th, 2008 at 6:44 pm
I know multiple sets of parents that only by the Britax car seats when cheaper models have the same or similar safety ratings. This post is funny and hit the nail on the head.
April 20th, 2008 at 7:16 pm
I am in trouble. I’m white but apparently not the “best white parent” I can be.
My kids don’t ride in Britax carseats. We play at public parks. They have normal, easy-to-spell names. Our high chair is from Ikea b/c it was $25. I buy and sell at consignment. Do I have to turn in my white card? My daughter might prefer that. Every doll she plays with is black or Hispanic looking.
April 21st, 2008 at 4:28 pm
hey blog lady,
check out this article in Toronto Life (aka magazine that best white parents like) called Baby Wars. It’s a gold mine!
http://www.torontolife.com/features/baby-wars/?pageno=1
April 21st, 2008 at 7:37 pm
I am a staunch proponent of child safety, especially my own child’s. Furthermore, I don’t trust anyone else with the safety of my child. As such, I must say that the Britax car seat doesn’t hold a candle to our homemade car seat. As long as it is properly anchored to the body of the vehicle, there is absolutely no chance that baby will be injured or anyone in the car injured by projectile babies.
May 2nd, 2008 at 4:38 pm
Again, I have to disagree with your narrow view. Many parents get the Britax because it has higher weight and height abilities along with the good safety ratings. Currently we use Cosco car seats for our children, but are having to consider a Britax to help our son stay rearfacing longer for his safety because his weight is nearing the weight limit for his current car seat (don’t ask me where he hides the weight…it’s very odd! Probably his thighs like mommy lol).
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